Monday, October 12, 2009

I'm the Mom on the Planet of the Apes

I picked up my son from guitar lessons tonight and I asked him whether he was too tired to stop at Walgreens to get batteries for my new boombox (It has an IPod dock. It's totally sweet.). Luckily he was agreeable. As usual he started frothing up in a retail frenzy the second he stepped into the store, taking off like he was fired out of a cannon. Before I knew it, he had a bag of bones for the faux graveyard we have set up under the pine tree, a giant headed ghoul with tattered shroud and light up eyes to hang over the basketball hoop, new ear buds for his IPod and a Halloween mask.


I was just about to put my foot down at the mask when he threw it on and looked at me. That was it. I was DONE. I laughed so hard I almost peed. He insisted on wearing it all the way home, mugging at everyone that pulled up next to us at the traffic light and accusing me of not loving him because he looked like an ape. It was all I could do not to drive off the road.


When we got home I set up my new boom box and he grabbed a microphone and microphone stand out of the den and he lip synced "Ain't No Other Man" by Christina Aguilera with the mask on. Again fits of hysterical laughter.


Either it takes very little to make me laugh or this is the funniest Halloween mask EVER. What do you think?







42 Your comments, banter and witty repartee:

Mare said...

Oh My GoD! It's like Cornelius with cataracts!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Mare - I know. Kind of like a George Burns/Monkey hybrid.

Lisa Page Rosenberg said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lisa Page Rosenberg said...

Trying again, sans typo:

I'm gonna go Dominick Dunne/Curious George.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

LPR - Mmmm hmmm. Yes I definitely see that. More current and topical too. Let's see what other combos we scare up here. . .

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

LMAO! That is so funny!! Better than my Jeda Fet!!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Lee - I can't look at the picture without laughing. If he's smart, he'll keep it handy and put it on when I am mad at him. It will totally break me up.

The Crazy Baby Mama said...

love it :) you guys are great ...

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Crazy Baby Mama - This is what you have to look forward to once they're too old for you to pick out their costume for them.

~*Michelle*~ said...

OK, this is the second time your comments made me laugh out loud (I just popped over from If Evolution Really Works.....)

I was SO totally thinking George Burns! Hilarious!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Michelle - Welcome. Happy to have you here. It is George Burns and Zippy the chimp's love child.

The Only Girl said...

Yes - I TOTALLY thought George Burns immediately! That is too funny. I love it!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

TOG - Poor guy must be spinning in his grave that his memory came to this. . . You look like a monkey mask.

hokgardner said...

With those glasses, I'm going to have to say Hairy Potter. (get it? Hairy?)

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

HOK - Yes! That's a good one. I think the wig that is attached to the mask is part of the reason it's so disturbing looking.

kyslp said...

That is hilarious - as are all the Cornelius/Dominick Dunne/ Curious George Burns comments.

My son wanted to buy a mask that oozed blood. Uh, no.

linlah said...

George Burns and Curious George for sure.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Kyslp - We had that mask. It ruined clothes, towels, rugs, you name it. Just say no!


Linlah - There's a handsome love child if ever I heard one.

Wendi said...

When you're out in public, just say, "Well, let's just say his father isn't a looker and leave it at that."

You're a good mom.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Wendi - I love the idea of blaming this on his father.

Amy said...

Listen very carefully DG:

Put that child on a plane to Louisiana IMMEDIATELY!!! I could use that sort of humor in my life on a daily basis! I nearly peed myself when I saw the pic! SOOO glad you posted it!

ape boy rocks!!!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Amy - OK, let's do the big North South boy swap. I'll take your snuggly one year old and you can have attitudinal ape boy. I kid him about being a teenager, but he really does make me laugh.

blueviolet said...

Ok, it made me burst out into a fit of giggles too! What a great mask!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Blue Violet - I can't believe we found it in a Walgreens Drug store.

Lin said...

Good look there! LOL! I like Lisa's comment of Dominick Dunne/Curious George. Good Call!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Lin - I know. You wouldn't expect a mask like that to look like any recognizable person. But it does, almost to the point of being distracting.

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

funniest mask ever - by far

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

SFTC - It kills me. I need him to not wear it for fear of needing Depends.

Tabitha@ichoosebliss said...

LOL@picture
Thank you for visiting me on my SITS Day!

I Wonder Wye said...

Looks just like Roddie McDowell! I wouldn't want to have it permanently..enjoy your teen, they grow up too fast! Stopping by from SITs.....

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Tabitha - Thank you for stopping in. Congrats again on your SITS day.

I Wonder Wye - Thank you for stopping in. Roddy McDowell is a good call.

Jen Chandler said...

Oh my gosh! That's even funnier than my husband's "Scary Orc Mask" and that one makes me collapse in the floor laughing so hard I can't breathe! I see why you had to buy it!

Jen

That One Mom said...

That is a fantastic mask!!! We have to have one!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Jen - Orc mask? So are you saying that WOW is spoken in your home? The boy is way into role playing games. To hear him and his friends talk about WOW and Warhammer and Everquest is like listening to another language.

That One Mom - Walgreens drugstore is the place to get it. I think it was pretty inexpensive, like under $20.

S3XinthePantry said...

It was a great buy... soooo funny!

peewee said...

I just love that you still call it a boom box. heh.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

S3X - Thanks. I may have to steal it and take it to work on 10/30.

Pee Wee - You know my age. What can I dO? I'm just too freakin old. That is what it said on the box though (or maybe my old brain tricked me into seeing that).

The Grounded Drink Lady said...

I love your kid!!!!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

The Grounded Drink Lady - Thanks. Me too. He's a blast.

Belle said...

Can I just say how awesome it is that he wanted THAT mask!?

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Belle - I know. Such highly developed taste for a 13 year old.

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