Saturday, January 23, 2010

Look What Fell Off My Family Tree Fridays


Calling all crazies! I am looking for four guest posters for a feature that I want to run on Fridays in February called "Look What Fell Off My Family Tree, Friday". You've all heard about the exploits and adventures of my crazy Uncle Ronnie. Now it's your turn to share. Do you have a cross dressing grandpa, a flatulent auntie, a brother who sunbathes naked on the front lawn? This is your opportunity to tell your story.

If you want to participate, please leave a comment below which includes the phrase -

'Yes! My family is as nutty as squirrel poo!".

Then send me an e-mail at diaryofamadbathroom@gmail.com telling me the following things:


- Relationship of person to you - Uncle, Aunt, Dad, etc.

- Brief statement of "the crazy" - Eats grass or spies on neighbors or thinks she's from Mars



You may know by now that I am not much of a rules person. However, the goal of your post should be funny. Here are the two general guidelines that you should follow:


1) No real names or pictures. Let's protect the crazies, particularly if it involves spying on the neighbors.

2) We're looking for crazy, not criminal. If you have a family member that hurts animals or engages in hate crimes, that is definitely not the brand of crazy that we are looking for.



Since there are four Fridays in February (5, 12, 19, 26), I will take the first four respondents that meet the criteria above. Come on and show us your nuts! Again, no photos.

33 Your comments, banter and witty repartee:

Sara said...

I think it's safe to say my grandparents live in a special world that is all their own. While they're very sweet and always give me money on my birthday like good grandparents should, they tend to lose touch with reality.

I would love to talk about the house they bought a few years ago and all the work they did to it after. There's so much I could say about paint chips, kitchen tile and carpeting.

I can't really post about it on my blog because I think they read it...

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Sara - If you want to write that post, I will give you a place to do it.

Joy said...

This is going to be a great series!

singedwingangel said...

Oh Lord I could fill an entire book since Ihave a family full of individuals who love to play practical jokes, pick and poke fun.. Like my late uncle who sold my dad fake indian rocks, my mom who gave my aunt a jar of potpourri with a cork to insert at bedtime so uncles gas no longer killed her while he slept, um me who gave my mom a dildo for christmas.. you get the drift.

Susan Fobes said...

Ok, I'm game if you are. My husband is constantly commenting about "them" (referring to my family) and we both refer to his family (good naturedly of course) as the Clampetts. So, 'Yes! My family is as nutty as squirrel poo!".

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

All - So far I have only heard the phrase that pays from Susan Fobes, though it sounds like Angel and Sara have a lot to say. I am anxious to hear all about the fruits and nuts that your family trees have to offer. Please shoot me an e-mail if you want to participate. diaryofamadbathroom@gmail.com

Allyson said...

My mother-in-law is as nutty as squirrel poo!! I can't believe I finally have an outlet. Does MIL count because she is batsh!t nuts...with 3 dogs, a cat and zero mental capacity. Emailing now...Yay!

Allyson said...

Um...your emails are bouncing back...

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Allyson - I am e-mailing to you so that you can reply. I will look for the error in my e-mail address in the mean time. I am very excited to hear about your MIL. MIL stories are usually the BEST.

Marla said...

I am a MIL. This has me scared. :-)

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Marla - You have nothing to worry about . . Do you?!?

Chief said...

I will be gone most of February so I am out,

your loss because my inlaws are nucking futs

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Chief - I'd consider a March post just for you.

Insanitykim said...

I think I am the only crazy one unfortunately. But, if I am writing in third person and I change my name, I guarantee you'll find out things you would NEVER see on my blog or hear coming directly from my mouth! *maniacal giggling over the thought of anonymous self-deprecation*

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Kim - I am game if you are. And I never heard a word of this. I have no idea that you are talking about you.

Noelle said...

oh, my...this sounds fun!

i lurve my gma but there was one time...at the airport when she ate too much sugarfree candy...and had an allergic reaction to the aspartame...and...well...it wasn't pretty. i could share that little nugget, if you'd like. it's pretty..uh...poopy, though.

Noelle said...

oh...and btw, she has passed away and will not have her feelings hurt or be in any way embarrassed by my sharing of said story. unless she's "watching over me now"...

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Noelle - We don't frown on poo humor here. This is not the Harvard Business Review. If you want to post, just e-mail me at diaryofamadbathroom@gmail.com and I'll let you know how to participate.

linlah said...

I'm looking forward to the squirrel poo filled guest posts.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Linlah - Squirrel poo filled goodness is probably the one promise I can deliver on.

Existential Waitress said...

Oh Lord, I sooo want to do this. My hubs has made me swear I won't write about his fam on the internet, but the stories I could tell. Although, my fam is pretty crazy too. Must think about this!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Existential Waitress - You can do it without linking back to me and you can change the names or even their relationship to you for cover.

Tracie said...

Yes! My family is nutty as squirrel poo!

My brother is a pseudo moutain man/Grizzly Adams who also has an affinity for alky-hol.

Ooops! Was I supposed to e-mail that?

Arizona Mamma said...

Great idea...look forward to reading these!

Kimberly said...

My MIL

She stole my "Victoria Secret" panties one time (broke into our house) took all my favorite panties and replaced them with (what my sister and I call) Nanna panties.

When I ask her for them she said "You don't need to seduce my son any more, you are married to him"

May she rest is peace. She lived right across the street. If you think "Everyone loves Raymond" was funny. Geez! The stories I could tell you would make you pee yourself!

KK said...

I'm afraid my family might want to write about me, yikes!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Tracie - Great! Call them out here!

AZ Mamma - Thanks. I am excited about it.

Kimberly - Ummm. Really? There's got to be great stories there!

KK - Have you supplied them with material? Do tell . . .

blueviolet said...

Oh man, I can't wait to read about the nutbaskets out there!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Blue Violet - You know it's gonna be good!

Amy said...

Dang, I just read this post! If someone backs out let me know. I just know I can conjure up a nutty family story!

Afterall, I live in a freaking circus at the moment!

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Amy - If you want in, you're in. Just e-mail me. I'd love for you to guest post.

miss jo said...

What a great idea....If you do this again I could write about how my mom covered for me when the neighborhood bully Marfart (Martha) came to beat me up for playing keep away/monkey in the middle with her beads on a neighbor's trampoline with my friend.

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