OK, OK you got me. That statement was false. I mean, to some people, middle age might bite, but I honestly don't mind getting older for the most part. There are some things - chin hair, being called 'mam, dealing with PTA mothers - that kind of suck but I still feel and think like a sixteen year old. A sixteen year old with the advantage of having much better judgement and a full time job. So on balance, it's really not a bad gig.
But there is a bit of push/pull between chronological age and mental age in certain circumstances. For example, how long is it OK to wear teal nail polish without looking like a complete tool? Or, do you buy the giant hoop earrings at Hot Topic when you are shopping for your 12 year old, or do you keep on walking? And most importantly, how long is it appropriate to have long hair?
This question surfaced the other night while I was watching "It's Complicated" for the umpteenthousandth time. I don't know what it is about that movie, but I find it charming. I think I might just enjoy seeing Meryl Streep get stoned and bake croissants. Anyway, I'm looking at Meryl, who has a good 13 years on me, but looks pretty good, and I'm wondering, would she look better/worse/older/younger with shorter hair? And, if I'm wondering this about her, is someone wondering this about me?
My friends and I have an inside joke about our mothers asking us when we are going to grow up and cut our hair. Why is it that short hair is viewed as "mature"? Quite honestly, I would prefer not to hear my name and the word mature in the same sentence. And when I look around at what my mother's generation might consider mature hair styles, the chunks come up at the back of my throat in what my daughter likes to call a "baby barf".
Let's explore what the "age appropriate" hair options are, shall we? For some reason, all middle aged women are portrayed as having a disobedient bowels, so let's check out the hair on some of the women in ads targeted at my demographic:
The lady from the Dulcolax commercial. Apparently, us middle-agers prefer mom jeans and a conservative bob for our ride on the poo poo blanket:
Jamie Lee Curtis sports a silver pixie and a big green couch to hawk her bowel stirring yogurt to constipated middle aged women:
And best of all, I found this blog offering tips for hairstyles that women over forty could consider because "beauty never stops". Here are some of the examples They are lovely women, to be sure. But, do they look like any forty year old women that you know or did this get cast from the local assisted living facility:
According to http://www.beauty-and-the-bath.com/Forty-Something.html, these are the styles that forty-something" ladies should be sporting. Any one else want to join me on the ledge? If these hairstyles are a sign of growing up, then I plan to be 16 forever.