Spam - the slimy, gelatinous meat in a can, not the e-mail kind.
PTA Moms - This frightening breed of uber-moms seems to live to gossip and judge and to make absolutely sure that you only get one playbill on LipSync Night.
Raw Chicken - No, really, I have bad dreams about cross-contamination.
Televangelists - They are a generically frightening bunch, but Benny Hinn's hair is truly terrifying.
Anything that Andrew Zimmern eats.
Radical Vegans - Peace out girl scout. I am cool with you eating twigs and dirt, you need to be cool with me having a big hairy steak. Mmmmmm, Flay Steak.
George Michael's Shorts in Wake Me Up Before You Go Go. - I mean, really? Wasn't he concerned with VPL (either visible panty lines or visible penis lines - it's your call).
Planking - Seriously, this is all there is for you to do? Come to my house and help me paint if you're bored.
Pea Puree - Everyone on Top Chef has parked a protein on top of pea puree. There was even controversy one season about someone stealing someone else's pea puree. What is with this trend? Is this really anything more than runny baby food? Besides, if you leave the peas whole, they are much easier for me to push aside with blatant disregard.
Absinthe - One time is all you need to know that this is the single most terrifying and volatile substance ever distilled. Keep your dignity . . .if someone offers you Absinthe, just say no (unless you like wearing a strangers underwear on your head, then, by all means, be my guest).
Be afraid. Be very afraid.